


Alert!

by teamrebecchi



Category: Neighbours (TV)
Genre: Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-08 23:54:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14705171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teamrebecchi/pseuds/teamrebecchi
Summary: Months after Gabe's kidnapping, Paige is struggling to cope with everyday life in Erinsborough resulting in her making a decision about her future.





	Alert!

_“Fear doesn’t shut you down; it wakes you up.”_

**Veronica Roth**

_“GABE!”_ Paige screamed as she jolted awake suddenly, hyperventilating as sweat begun to drip into her eyes causing them to burn.  

With every breath, the room started to spin and she felt disorientated to the point of almost passing out. Even in the darkness, she felt as though she was back in that moment when she realised Gabe had been taken and was watching helplessly as the car sped away. As her breathing got heavier, she struggled to keep her eyes open until she looked over to Gabe’s crib and even with the tiny ray of light shining in the room, she wasn’t able to see him.

 _“Gabe?”_ Paige whispered before the horror of losing him again sunk in and she screamed. _“GABE?”_

She jumped out of bed so fast that her foot got tangled up in the sheets causing her to fall to the ground, landing on her wrist violently before quickly getting up to race to Gabe’s cot. The noise woke him up and he stared up at Paige as she lent over the crib.

 _“Oh, my God! Oh, my God!”_ Paige said softly.

Seeing that Gabe was okay, that he was still in his crib and was smiling up at her caused Paige to break down into tears, collapsing along the side of the crib while holding onto it. As she started to cry, so did Gabe which caught her attention. She slowly picked herself up off the ground and wiped away the tears before picking Gabe up, winching as she started to feel the pain in her wrist. She held onto him tightly and slowly made her way downstairs, sitting alone on the couch in the dark while holding onto Gabe. Her breathing slowed the longer she held him and the more pain she realised she was in but she couldn’t bear to let go of him, causing her to cry again as everything she was thinking and feeling came to the surface.

Things were getting worse for her on a daily basis. She could barely sleep and when she did, she had endless nightmares about losing Gabe again - of him being lost forever. It was as though it was happening every day and night. That she was always at risk of losing him and when she did sleep, she woke in a cold sweat, expecting to find Gabe gone. She couldn’t stop thinking that way – it was playing on her mind constantly. It was the same whenever she tried to leave the house. Whether it was to go to work or the shops or just go about her everyday activities with Gabe. Those thoughts were always at the back of her mind. She couldn’t even leave the house without freaking out and if she did, the outcome was always the same. It was as if her senses were heightened to point where every second out of the house involved scanning the environment, looking over her shoulder, being on edge and seeing threats around every corner. It got worse when she was with Gabe and other people were around, particularly as she was torn between keeping a closer eye on Gabe or watching those around her in case something happened.

She started to remember everything that had happened earlier that day, when she attempted to take Gabe to the park in order to get some fresh air. It had started out as such a nice day but things started to change, especially when the park got more crowded and she heart people walking behind her. The air turned cold and she could feel goosebumps forming on her arms, her breathing got heavier and it was as though everything around her was moving in slow motion as she was continuing at the same pace. She didn’t make eye contact with anyone but she could feel people watching her but she was determined to keep her eye on Gabe to the point where she nearly walked directly into Lassiters Lake, before a man reached out, touching her on the shoulder which caused her to panic, taking Gabe and running out of the park. It felt as though nowhere felt safe anymore, like someone was watching her, just waiting to strike. It wasn’t until Mark turned up at the house an hour later that she even realised she left the pram and all of her belongings behind.

Her relationship with Mark had started to suffer as well. As much as she tried, she couldn’t let him anywhere near Gabe. She knew he tried his best and did everything he could to get Gabe back to her but just thinking about him reminded her that if she hadn’t gone back to Mark, if she hadn’t let him take Gabe out that day, if she had listened to Jack and taken notice of the investigation and that Mark had enemies, none of this would have happened. Louise only took him so that Mark would help her and deep down, she couldn’t help but feel that it was her fault. Gabe would never have been put into the line of fire and everything would be different now if she'd recognised the potential danger that Gabe was in. She messed up and it nearly cost her, her son and it was all she could think about where Mark was concerned. She’d never considered the consequences of her actions and now, it was all she could think about and because of that, she couldn’t bear to be anywhere near Mark or let him near Gabe in case something like that happened again.

As she sat alone in the dark, she realised just how vigilant she had to be now where Gabe was concerned. She had to be sure that she didn’t leave him along with the wrong people, that he was always safe and that no one could get to him or hurt him and she had to make sure that she never placed him in dangerous situations. Even by doing so, there was still a chance that he could get hurt and it scared her how easily it could happen, especially in Erinsborough and with every precaution that she took. 

 _“Are you alright?”_ a voice called out from the darkness causing Paige to jump in a panic and scream as she clung to Gabe tightly.

 _“Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”_ Terese said softly as she appeared out of the shadows, turning the light on.

 _“You didn’t.”_ Paige whispered as she held Gabe closely and took a deep breath to maintain her composure as Terese walked towards her and sat beside her on the couch.

 _“Are you okay?”_ Terese asked.

 _“I, um… not really.”_ Paige responded as her voice started to break up. _“Sorry.”_

 _“Oh, you have nothing to apologise for. You’ve been through a lot.”_ Terese said.

 _“I know. It’s just… I can’t live like this, Terese. It’s just too much to deal with.”_ Paige replied quietly.

 _“Have you considered maybe talking to a psychologist?”_ Terese asked.

_“Yeah, I have but…”_

_“But what?”_

_“Why do you stay in Erinsborough? So much has happened to you here. Wouldn’t it be better to just leave everything behind and star fresh?”_ Paige inquired.

_“Oh, um… I’m not really sure. I guess in a way it would have been better but, I have a lot of nice memories here too and my family and friends, people I wouldn’t want to leave behind.”_

_“I don’t, um… I don't have that – not anymore."_ Paige's voice broke up as she started to cry. _"It’s just… So much has happened and especially now… everything and everyone just reminds me of nearly losing Gabe. Does that sound stupid?”_

 _“No. No, not at all.”_ Terese responded reassuringly.

 _“It’s just…"_  Paige took a deep breath, attempting to maintain her composure and wiping away her tears. " _everything is different now. It’s like I can’t relax and my mind is in overdrive - it just won't stop and I keep thinking that something really, really bad is going to happen._   _I can’t even be around anyone anymore without thinking the worse and..."_

Paige's breathing started to get faster and heavier and she broke down crying. " _I... I don’t feel safe here, Terese. Gabe isn't safe here and it scares me because I know, okay? I know that I won’t always be able to be there to protect him but I can lose him so easily and this place... I just can't be in a place where I nearly lost my son. I can't do it anymore!"_

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> *this is basically a rewrite of paige's exit storyline. i wasn't a fan of how the show wrote her out and the fact that gabe's kidnapping was almost completely ignored so this is my version of it. 
> 
> *paige's behaviour in this fic is trauma based


End file.
